When Character Loses It's Colour

2010-02-14T01:41:00.000-08:00

www.vivalajessiica.tumblr.com

FOLLLOOOWW MEE.

500 days of....

2010-01-26T23:43:00.001-08:00

Reaallyyyyyy excited..HEELLAWWW DAKOTA. ;D

2010-01-24T21:33:00.000-08:00

I Like the way Hanna Beth thinks.

2010-01-24T15:17:00.000-08:00

"this week i really have learned who my true friends are.. i am sick of the lies.. i am sick of walking out of a room & having people i thought were a close friend making comments behind my back.. i am done with the second chances.. if you can't be a real friend i don't need you in my life.. i deserve the same respect i give to my friends.. but for some reason being too nice means people want to walk all over you.. not anymore.. i always give people the benefit of the doubt, but i am done.. life is too short to put up with this negativity.. it's draining.. it takes away from who you really are.. i want positive people in my life.. people with goals, dreams.. people who value the true meaning of a friend.."

Proper post later on...still too tired and partially intoxicated to concentrate too hard on words and the structure of sentences.

Blah Blah Blah

2010-01-21T21:09:00.000-08:00

Listening to and LOVING Ke$has album..I really do have a girl crush on her. Guilty Pleasure. (L)

Went to Jupiters with the kids today. Twas so much fun catching up with everyone today. LISAAA, i love hanging with you and i love my gravitational pull to your boobies ;) Bought some Evian water, Yeah i felt pretty fancy. 4.20 fo a litre. Harrow. Alex got pierced. HAH i think im gonna get my conch pierced. Yayer. So we're standing outside of industrie

Me- Mmmm Evian Im feeling Fancy and french.

Dylan- Fuck France they started ww2

Benita- no they didn't hitler started ww2. I studied modern I did fucking good in that course too.

Me- yeah Hitler started WW2. Dannggiitt.

Dylan- NO THEY DIDNT FRANCE DID BECAUSE THEY FOUGHT HITLER WHEN HE TRIED TO INVADE THEM!!

Me- NO THEY DIDN'T!!

Benita - FUCK HITLER DID IT.

Dylan- No Brittan declared war so..they started the war Hitler was just happy with invading and ruling all of the European countries.

Eden- Why are you guys fighting about a war that happened ages ago?

Me- ...Oh Benita He's got you on a technicality there..

Eden- WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU FIGHTING OVER THE PAST WHEN THE PAST DIDNT FIGHT OVER US.

Went to Jupiter Cafe after and just chilled, I saw so many people today Thily, Trina, Kim.P, Jess Hoang, Juicy John, Michael Bui, Kevin, And DANIIEELLL!!

"What the fuck Jess you're with white people? Where are your asian friends?"
"oh, i thought id try something new, I still love you guise ;D
"So...who's the hot blonde youre sitting next to?"
"Oh thats Lisa..shes mine ;D"
" Does she have big boobs?"
"kinda the same size as me"
"DAYYUMM JESSS SHES BETTER THAN YOU COS SHES BLONDE!!"

Thanks Daniel.

I feel in the dumps right now, I feel like the worst person in the history of the world. Drama is not my friend. Angst is strong in this one.

Worst part when i found out about "the plan" I thought of the one person that I shouldnt have.

Now the party's overAnd everybody's goneI'm left here with myself and i wonder what went wrongAnd now my heart is brokenLike the bottles on the floorDoes it really matter?Or am I just hung over you?

John Green is a GENIUS

2010-01-20T17:56:00.000-08:00

"Lucky Charms are like the vampires of breakfast cereal. They're magical, they're delicious, they're a little bit dangerous and bad for you. They initially make you feel great, but then over time you realize that maybe your relationship with Lucky Charms is just a little bit unhealthy and you start to think, 'Maybe I don't want to be in a long-term relationship with a breakfast cereal that tastes delicious but damages my health.' But then the Lucky Charms gets all stalker on you and for some reason you kind of like that. It makes you feel special. So yeah, you spend your life with Lucky Charms. That's awesome. That's a great way to... get diabetes."

"3. Babies are made through an act that you will eventually find intriguing but for right now will just sort of horrify you, and also sometimes people do stuff that involves baby-making parts that does not actually involve making babies, like fore instance kiss each other in places that are not on the face."

"Colin did not laugh. Instead he thought, Tampons have strings? Why? Of all the major human mysteries - God, the nature of the universe, etc. - he knew the least about tampons. To Colin, tampons were a little bit like grizzly bears: he was aware of their existence, but he'd never seen on in the wild, and didn't really care to."

"Well, while you were in the bathroom, I sat down at this picnic table here in Bumblefug, Kentucky, and noticed that someone had carved that GOD HATES FAG, which, aside from being a grammatical nightmare, is absolutely ridiculous. So I'm changing it to 'God Hates Baguettes.' It's tough to disagree with that. Everybody hates baguettes. "

I dont really care where you live at, just turn around let me hit that.

2010-01-20T16:17:00.000-08:00

Mean Girls, Explains things better than anything.

2010-01-19T14:22:00.000-08:00

If only you knew how mean she really is... You'd know that I'm not allowed to wear hoop earrings, right? Yeah! Two years ago she told me hoops earrings were *her* thing and I wasn't allowed to wear them anymore. And then for Hannakuh my parents got this pair of really expensive white gold hoops and I had to pretend like I didn't even like them and... it was so sad. And you know she cheats on Aaron? Yes, every Thursday he thinks she's doing SAT prep but really she's hooking up with Shane Oman in the projection room above the auditorium! I never told anybody that because I am SUCH a good friend!

Why should Caesar get to stomp around like a giant, while the rest of us try not to get smushed under his big feet? What's so great about Caesar? Hm? Brutus is just as cute as Caesar. Brutus is just as smart as Caesar. People totally like Brutus just as much as they like Caesar. And when did it become okay for one person to be the boss of everybody, huh? Because that's not what Rome is about. We should totally just *stab* Caesar!

Having a Gretchen Wieners moment and also feeling like this

Just one of those things..

2010-01-14T20:49:00.000-08:00

J-...hence me considering becoming a lesbian.

A- NONO DONT BECOME A LESBIAN! THINK OF ALL THE GUYS!

No, better yet THINK OF ______!!!

J- NOWAY! He probably only wants sex too!

A- no he's asian

they want honour and respect

and eyes.

J- but hes also in a band

groupies threw themselves at that honour and respect and drowned it in sex a long time ago.

So, it was my Great Aunty Daph's Funeral yesterday, My Nanna's sister. There was alot of driving a fair bit of crying. It took 20 minutes to talk one of her grandaughters out of the church. It was so sad. One of my younger cousins pointed out to me in all of her wisdom:

"Thats like...her nanna, we're gonna be like that when nanna dies"

Freaked me out a fair bit.

Youre funny, you talk but all i hear is silliness.

2010-01-09T03:56:00.001-08:00

Blah blah blah blah...

I really love it how i tell you about how I'm feeling and your only efforts at consoling me is a selfish response.

Gooddaysir.

And I think we're both too scared..

2010-01-08T04:52:00.000-08:00

"Its okay to lose your pride over someone you love.

But don't lose someone you love though, over your pride."

SKINSSKINSSKINS

2010-01-08T04:17:00.001-08:00

Yes yes yes ITS THAT TIME OF THE YEAR AGAIN WHERE SKINS MANIA IS ON THE HORIZON. And all of my posts will be skins related and I'll be posting trailers and photos and clips from episodes. OHGOD SKINS MARATHON!!!!!!

P.S Luke Pasqualino you are lookin mighhttaayyyyeee fyynnee with your longer scruffy hair.

Green Cake (L)

2010-01-06T03:39:00.000-08:00

andrew says:

*taro cake

' VIVA LA JESSICA says:

*yay?

andrew says:

*its bloody good!

' VIVA LA JESSICA says:

*is that

*the green cake

andrew says:

*no

*its

*purple ish

' VIVA LA JESSICA says:

*oh

*me likes the green cake

andrew says:

*no

*this is an actual cake

*my grandpas birthday

*hahaha

' VIVA LA JESSICA says:

*aww

*happy birthday grandpa

*but seriously

*i actuallylike green cake

andrew says:

*what green cake?

' VIVA LA JESSICA says:

*its asian green cake

*i think

*its what they make green waffles with

andrew says:

*OOOOOOH

*yeah theyre good

' VIVA LA JESSICA says:

*yeah

*green cake <3

okay seriously, this is no joking matter. whats the green cake called?

OKAY I FOUND OUT...

Thanks Andrew, youre a champ

andrew says:

*you even posted it on fb

*LOL

' VIVA LA JESSICA says:

*yeah

*i'm hoping someone

*will tell me

*what the green cake is called

andrew says:

*the green stuff is pandan

' VIVA LA JESSICA says:

*...oh.

*so whats that

andrew says:

*some miracle fruit that makes waffles green

' VIVA LA JESSICA says:

*ohmygod.

*miracle fruit

*i love you

Oh hellawww (L)

2010-01-04T19:18:00.000-08:00

www.blogsecret.tumblr.com

2010-01-04T17:12:00.000-08:00

14061.) Boys think I'm a tease because I won't have sex with them unless I'm dating them. But what they don't understand is: if we were in a RELATIONSHIP, and I knew that he truly cared about me, we could have all the sex he wanted. Maybe it's just me, but I like to call that standards

Third Post of the evening

2010-01-04T04:35:00.000-08:00

"Every girl has that one boy in her life, who could call her at three in the morning and say, “Let’s hang out. I’m coming to get you.” and she would put aside everything she was doing, her excitement, her anger or her momentary hate for him. And she would proceed to give him only four words, “give me ten minutes.”

Unfortunately for me, this is far too true right now, and for all the wrong reasons. More importantly, for the wrong person, And quite frankly I'm not okay with that.

Wake Up In The Morning Feeling Like Lord Voldy.

2010-01-04T03:02:00.000-08:00

Wake up in the morning feeling like Lord Voldy

Grab my trunk, I'm on my broom
Going to Diagon Alley
Before I leave, let my owl out and have a quick snack
Cause when I leave for Hogwarts, I ain't coming back

I'm talkin' going out to buy our robes, robes
Tryin' out all those new wands, wands
Goblins keep all our gold, gold
Train-hopping, gotta get on that Express today
Pulling up to the castle
Trying to get a little bit sorted

Chorus:
Don't pick Gryffindor
I don't want to be a bore
Or those Hufflepuff
I don't find enough stuff
Ravenclaw talks a lot
But the party rocks on with
Sly-y-y-y-the-rinnnn, Sly-y-y-y-the-rinnnn!

[repeat chorus]

Ain't got a care in the world, we're passing Potions like yeah
Ain't got no problems with Dumbledore, and Snape's chilling right here
And now, the girls are lining up cause they hear we're Death Eaters
But we kick them to the curb unless their families are pure blood

I'm talking about everybody has dark marks, marks
We're tryin' to raise him up, up
Gonna bring the Dark Lord Voldemort back, back

Now, now, we go until the Prophecy's true, true
Or the Order shuts us down, down
Order shuts us down, down
Order shuts us

[Chorus x 2]

Voldy, you are the one
You killed the spare
My Dark Mark's hot
With my wand up
You got that spell
Yeah, Avada

Voldy, you are the one
You killed the spare
My Dark Mark's hot
With my wand up
You got that spell
Raise your wand up
Raise your wand up
No, the party don't stop til Voldemort wins

[Repeat Chorus Until End]

http://juanitothevampire.deviantart.com/art/WakeUpInTheMorning-LordVoldy-148367704

SOUNDWAVE EAT YOUR HEART OUT.

2010-01-04T02:28:00.000-08:00

Ace Enders whole tour

After Midnight Project

Anarbor

Alesana

Andrew WK

Artist Vs. Poet

Attack Attack!

Breathe Carolina

Breathe Electric

Bring Me The Horizon

Call The Cops 6/24 - 7/18

Chaseband

Chase Long Beach

Closure In Moscow (AUSTRALIAN)

Confide

Deal’s Gone Bad

Disco Curtis

Emarosa

Emmure

Enter Shikari

Every Time I Die

Eyes Set To Kill

Fake Problems

Far From Finished

Fight Fair

Flatfoot

Haste The Day

Hey Monday

Initials

In Fear and Faith (gonna be @soundwave)

I See Stars

iwrestledabearonce

Last Call Chernobyl

Mayday Parade

Middle Finger Salute

Motion City Soundtrack

NeverShoutNever

Of Mice and Men

Parkway Drive (AUSTRALIAN!!!!!!!!!)

Pierce The Veil

Polar Bear Club

Reel Big Fish

Rev Peyton’s Big Damn

Riverboat Gamblers

Set Your Goals

Sparks The Rescue

Speakeasy Tiger

Suicide Silence

Sum 41

The All-American Rejects

The Cab

The Casualties

The Dillinger Escape Plan

The Frantic

The Flatliners

The Rocket Summer

The Snips 7/9 - 7/10

The Swellers 6/24 - 7/17

The Summer Set

The Word Alive

Tip The Van

VersaEmerge

We Are The In Crowd

We The Kings

Whitechapel

You Me at Six

This is what a music festival should look like. June 24 - August 15th MY 18TH IS RIGHT IN

THE GOD DAMN MIDDLE. SOMEONE TAKE ME ;) All of the bolded bands are those i would be torn between seeing.

Too Lazy for an actual post.

2010-01-02T21:16:00.000-08:00

New Years Resolution

2010-01-02T02:45:00.000-08:00

To get with a really hot white guy, im talking so hot im the envy of every fem who encounters us..the sexy couple. Its not essential that you like the same music as me..and have at least two piercings and perhaps a tat and longer than the "normal" length for man hair.

But it is preferred

OKAY SO SERIOUSLY i dont have a new years resolution.

Speaking of new years. It was wild. I dont think a post can do it justice of just how whorey it was...or moreso how whorey i was HAHAHA. For those of you who were there we all know how that amazing night went down.

Epic.

2010-01-01T17:16:00.001-08:00

"Life Is What You Make Of It"

2009-12-30T01:03:00.000-08:00

I keep repeating those words over and over again. Over and over and over. Those words have never been truer.

Im still having a major freak out regardless. What do i say. What do i do. Ive been imagining this situation. Except they were on my terms. When i was ready. Where i wanted to be. What i wanted to say. Now none of that is applicable here.

Life Is What You Make Of It. Life Is What You Make Of It. Life Is What You Make Of It. Life Is What You Make Of It. Life Is What You Make Of It.

empty hearts and empty places.

2009-12-29T03:02:00.000-08:00

I can safely say it has hit me. Its hit me like a ton of bricks.

I may not have known you as well as i should have or as much as i might have liked. You showed me kindness when none of the others would, in fact you went out of your way. I will forever appreciate that simple act of kindness you showed me on multiple occasions. Contrary to what others are doing ill also remember your faults, after all you were human and those faults may have made me dislike you on occasion but you were still an amazing person to have known.

My deepest condolences go out to your family and everyone who was basically family to you.

17 aint so sweet.

2009-12-27T03:04:00.000-08:00

Somethings just shouldnt happen when youre 17. Somethings just shouldnt happen at all.

fmd.

2009-12-25T02:48:00.001-08:00

And here we go again

With all the things we said

And not a minute spent

To think that we'd regret

So we just take it back,

These words and hold our breath

Forget the things we swore we meant

Happy Birthday Jesus (^)

2009-12-25T01:14:00.001-08:00

It really doesn't feel like Christmas. I'm more aware of the biblical importance of today as opposed to the "hallmark" importance.

FUN FACT: Santa used to be green.

Not joking, google it. My marvelous parents bought me a soundwave ticket for christmas and a branddd new 50 inch plasma as a "whole family present". Kudos.

The Beautiful Clara Cam (www.lovelclaraa.blogspot.com) came to my house today, because of her ricealicious background going out on christmas day wasnt a huge deal plus her family and my family are basically one big exotic family. Multiculturalism is a beautiful thing. Just chilled and caught up I've missed her so muchhhhhhhhh (L)

It Tasted Like America. It Tasted Like Freedom.

2009-12-24T02:33:00.000-08:00

Cute note from Jesse in one hand and my american candy cane in the other.

Life is brilliant right now.

Saw Where The Wild Things Are with Dylan today, its pretty epic. Totally Digged it..NO I DIDNT CRY! I wanted to though it was cute.

Proper Post Later. Coming Down off my American Sugar Rush. I'm feeling exotic.

MERRY CHRISTMAS.
I get to celebrate christmas twice. One of the many perks of being half australian half serbian. (L)

I cant change the past i locked my keys in the delorian

2009-12-17T02:25:00.000-08:00

This post will not contain any talk of results. That is all.

Yesterday I went to the magical land of stockies with the magnificent Taylah Rae. I had to go drop off Rickys paintball tickets which he conveniently left in my bag last friday. So we walked to Alex's house in that god awful heat. Heat + pale complexion = terrible idea. Thanks to rickys "kind" words of encouragement "get the fuck here faster i want to show you our new songs". Speaking of new songs they were really good and worth the trek (Y) Band prac is amazing esp. when you sit right next to ricky while he plays the drums. Helllawwww being deaf by the age of 22. Furthermore, Alex got me addicted to "cat face" which is this really stupid but hilarious cartoon

There are about 17 eps so far, I wish i could decipher his advice at the end of this ep except i cannot, usually they are realllyyyy funny. MEANWHILE our heroine jessica discovered the amazing water spray bottle thing and started attacking people...i.e RICKY me being the staunchy stealthy young man i am. I managed to k.o him..but revenge is sweet and it came in the form of the illusion of boob sweat. fuck you ricky. Ivana came and picked us up and we drove the whole FOUR MINUTES to stockies (Y) (Y) and as soon as i got there i had to leave thanks to the rebellious douche i call my sister. A story in which is not blog worthy.

Jason messages me at abou 9:45 asking if i want to go to his place to eat amazing jason cooked food, which i happily obliged to. Instead we ended up getting kebab at that place on the highway. We were really hesitant at the actual health standards of the place it looked pretty filthy but it tasted sooo good. We ended up walking around chipping norton lake which was really nice but abit spooky. AND GUESS WHATT NO MOZZIE BITES HEELLZZ YEAAHH.

Finally on another note, its nice to be on good terms again, though i still find myself wanting to keep the distance "just in case".

I think its a bad sign that you're the only person who under the circumstances managed to cheer me up somewhat. Terrible sign.

What can you say about a society who says god is dead and elvis is alive?

2009-12-14T23:26:00.000-08:00

Okay so the daily post thing is finally down the tube. SMD if you have an issue with that. I've been busy.

The past few days have consisted of:

dying Alex's hair, which believe it or not is harder MUCH harder than dying a girls hair. we were standing in priceline for atleast 20 minutes.

Me: So what about this one?

Alex: Nah its not rich enough.

Me: okay so..this one? oh come on look she has those slut eyes you cant say no to that.

Alex: yeah but its really mousey and she isnt that hot..i like her shes got that i like pretending i dont like it rough look.

To make things worse he wouldnt stop moving and showing people on webcam what i was doing which made me get dye everywhere. But i really like the end result. Im amazing at shaving hair and dying hair. Im just..amazing. Apparently its too dark but guys come on..its amazing. Even lisa says so. OH AND JUST SO WE ARE CLEAR I AM NOT A BLONDE

Sorry for the terrible writing but I AM BRUNETTE GUISE chill the fuck out. But its okay i understand how hot i would look if i went blonde. I actually really wanna go blone but like lady gaga blonde? Well thats what all the dumbass youngin's are calling PLATINUM BLONDE. God guys GROW A BRAIN..read a book or something. Or just read my blog. Simple ;D. Okay so back to my amazing lifestyle. I chilled with Lisa,Ricky and Alex. Which resulted in having an amazing timmmmeeee. And also committing a misdemeanor, look what you do to me lisa.

Went to my cousin Marleys 6th birthday, the food was epic. Ohgod i missed fairy bread.

Spent 3 days at my Other 4 cousins house James, Patrick, Vanessa and Camryn. I have developed an addiction for Shaun the sheep. It is such an amazing cartoon, all of these rebel sheep being all staunch and shit its so hek and their farmer is a ranga. EPIC EPIC WIN.

You can tell they are related to me cause of how good they are at being little shits. The cutest thing happened this morning though.

6:30 am- i hear my door open.
James (hes 9) : oh sorry for waking you. *closes door
7:15 (god damn early i know).
James: Sorry for interrupting your sleep earlier i just wanted to make sure you didnt leave.
Me: i wouldnt leave in the middle of the night james.
James: yeah i know..but you couldve left at 5am without saying goodbye.

Little kids are epic (Y) .

Speaking of little kids, Justin Beiber. What.The.Hell?

And girl your my one love

my one heart

my one life for sure

let me tell you one time (girl i love, girl i love you)

etc..

HE IS 12

Honestly does he even have armpit hair yet...any hair of the pubic variety?

How can a 12 year old honestly comprehend loving a girl when he doesn't even realize "that funny smell" is his armpits.

Love to ya mum.

The Dreamers EP.

2009-12-10T03:08:00.000-08:00

Young Heretics are a duo consisting of Kitty Hart and her boyfriend ex-frontman of the getaway plan Matthew Wright. They are pretty much the polar opposite of what the getaway plan were but i love his voice with this kind of music, although it isnt featured as much as Kitty's is. I just bought their ep from their big cartel site $7 inc. postage which i think was pretty darn amazing plus i couldnt find it anywhere else. Totally worth it.

That is all.

P.S I just got my pay pal receipt, i just gave Matthew Wright $7, oddly enough i got all giddy and excited that my money went directly to him. ;D

Who Brings A Knife To A Gunfight?

2009-12-10T01:00:00.000-08:00

Im making an effort to blog everyday, although i dont i still try.

I have this killer sunburn its painful and i hate the sun for harming my pale skin in such a way.

I have this strange addiction to a website www.chictopia.com its basically a fashion site for random people around the world to accumulate "chic" points, which are gained through viewers voting for how "chic" their outfits are. Which i find quite interesting some of the more uglier outfits get alot of points whereas alot of the more..wearable outfits are just dogged.

I cant really think of many of what i consider ugly outfits as "fashion forward" They are ugly in the sense that it looks like they got dressed in the dark with a blind fold on..in a thrift store that sells nothing but horrid pieces that shouldve been burned years ago. Its terrible. Its like rewarding people for looking like douche bags.

I mean im not saying i dress like Agnes Deyn, But i dont throw on my nanas green over sized sun dress, a straw hat and a pair of aviators and then take a photo of it thinking i look like i just finished doing a photo shoot for vouge....and just so we are clear the above description is an accurate account of a photo that one of the "chictopians" posted. I tell no lies.

I have noticed though alot of girls who live in those small cute countries in Europe have amazing style. I have a girl-crush on this girl who has her own blog http://crookedzone.blogspot.com/

Love to ya mum. x.

She Takes Me High.

2009-12-09T02:27:00.000-08:00

I got we the kings new album of my uh "friend" the internet today ;D Its called "Smile Kid" Its absolutely ammazzing. Its really up beat, the only bitch remark i have is WHY IN THE NAME OF ALL THINGS MUSICAL DID YOU GUYS DO A COLLABORATION WITH DEMI LO-FREAKING-VATO?!!?!!?! Other than that its an amazing album. I love the song she takes me high. its lovely. Honestly i urge you guys to listen to it.

I went to the magical glebe markets with my wongcakes, and guys..i BOUGHT A SKIRT...A FLORAL PRINT SKIRT..and i love it. like..alot. Best $20 I've ever spent. I had such a lovely time with wong it was such a nice day. It was such good market weather. We've been having such whack weather lately i hate the not knowing its so cool in the morning and then it becomes incredibly hot and i cant take that shit. Im white as i burn easily. I BURN EASY OKAY UV RAYS DO YOU LIKE GIVING ME MELANOMAS HUH DO YA'!?!

On sunday i went on a shopping spree with my mummm and i bought a lovely dress and a bone tank to go with my skirt i wasnt really feelin the black tank with the skirt. I saw the most amazing pair of gladiator sandals but they were about $75 and I'm in "save for christmas" mode i didnt buy them i regret it though cause they were so comfy and so pretty and they fit perfectly.

Something i saw when i was walking through uh i think it was Big W, there are..GOSSIP GIRL SHOES.

Apologies for the dodgy camera work i was just so shocked, its kinda hilarious really. Furthermore on the shoe note, someone please find and then BUY me these amazing boots:

I will love you forever.

I found this sick picture of Gabe Saporta and as i saw it i thought of you, MITCHELL TRAN. Not sure why but anything cobra related made me think of you. (L)

Love to ya mums. xx.

Its okay to be fake.

2009-12-03T17:20:00.000-08:00

I find it appalling that the one person i should be able to rely on and trust beyond anyone else is the one person who i cannot rely on. Nor can i believe one word that comes out of your mouth at this stage. I love you. But seriously Reevaluate what your motives are.

Love In Technicolor

2009-12-03T15:02:00.001-08:00

Okay, i've appropriately titled my blog with the highly anticipated (by very few cause noone knows who he is) Album by Jesse Barrera. Along with my sudden urge to revamp my wardrobe i went on a massive MASSIVE ebay impulse spree luckily i've been out bid on the things i didn't really want. But what i did buy for a LOVELY $22.75 (inc. postage)

THATS RIGHT a lovellyyyy jesse barrera t-shirt which is full of beauty and wonder. Okay so it isnt exactly the greatest look tee but jesse barrera is amazing, and i thought heyy some friendly support wouldnt hurt. Plus im getting a "free gift" and a "personalized" note in the spirit of christmas. (L)

Jesse Barrera does a cover of..well his own bands song "Tired and Uninspired" with Aj Rafael, i absolutely love this version, its basically the only time i enjoy the presence of Aj haha. Other than that i really dont like him. THATS RIGHT CLARA.

I was supposed to go to hype tonight, but i got bailed on and couldnt find another ride home in time. So im missing out on a good time. I was looking forward to chilling with the kids but ah well. Better luck next time?

Trust - The obligation or responsibility imposed on a person in whom confidence or authority is placed.

Reliability - that may be relied on; dependable on achievement, accuracy, honesty, etc.

Im losing faith in such words and the fact that people can associate their characteristics with such qualities. Instead the following tend to appear in ones vocabulary.

Selfish - devoted to caring only for oneself; concerned primarily with one' s own interests, benefits, welfare etc.

Lie - a false statement made with deliberate intent to deceive; an intentional untruth.

I'm not about to turn around and call myself perfect but i do try to be honest and reliable. Now that schools over its hard to find a balance between everything we've all had a routine for 6 years and now we have to establish a new one thus shaking foundations and forcing us to reevaluate our priorities. And for that i apologise, but i do not find myself having to lie about a situation nor do i find myself cancelling plans to create others. And for that i find myself losing faith in everything we once stood for, how can i put my faith in people who lie and manipulate and hurt others while still remaining ignorant, stubborn and in denial of the wrongdoings they have committed?

My dad always told my sister and i that when you lie you may be forgiven once maybe twice, but people remember what you've done and said and eventually if you keep it up noone will want to associate with a liar.

This love will tear us apart.

2009-12-02T01:52:00.000-08:00

A BIG HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MR ANDREW HUYNH!!!

18 BUD. LIVE IT UP!!!

I went into DIY madness this afternoon i dyed my jeans which lead to dying another pair of jeans which lead to dying a tshirt and distressing a pair of old black skinnies i found the other day. Im quite the awsome right now. As a result i have blue hands and blue legs.

Looks live ive been involved in promiscuous activities with a smurf.
Ill post photos up of my masterpieces once theyve dried and such.

I've been helping a certain friend with a breakup and he keeps lecturing me on how im always right with the advice i give him. Its one of those situations in which i should follow my own advice yet i fail to. Though i find helping him with his breakup helped alot with mine in terms of understanding things i chose to ignore which is always magnificent to hear :) Sometimes it just takes some perspective. Or something along those lines.

On another note, my number one is feeling abit down today so i thought id cheer her up abit

That love goes both ways beautiful ;D cheer up. (L)(L)

Silence Isnt Golden.

2009-12-01T02:36:00.000-08:00

ITS A CHRISTMAS MIRACLE!! IM BACKKKKKK!!!!

It took me a while but i finally got off my lazy ass and decided to blog.

December 1st, the first day of summer. And i think it reached like a maximum of 19 degrees. Epic fail mother nature. Epic Fail.

In other news our BRAND SPANKIN NEW and our third(?) opposition leader Tony Abbott was announced today. Now Personally I'm ecstatic to know that our potential prime minster in the event of a re-election stands for Speedos and doesn't stand for contraceptives. You're a real champ man (Y) *note.sarcasm.

I cannot wait for friday. HYPE @ CASTLE HILL. STATE OF EAST LONDON, RESIST THE THOUGHT, PRAY FOR DEATH + more TBA. super super stoked. Cannot wait to see the gang. Alex, Ricky, Taylah, Edencakes.

Friday marked my first ever golf buggy experience. One in which i will not soon forget. My dear, dear uncle you hire the most goodlooking males. Kudos to you, i knew we were related for a reason. Has anyone ever seen on tv that "im the guy and im gonna teach the girl how to play golf so i can touch her" maneuver? Yes? If not youtube it i couldnt find it. But ill explain the male stands behind the female in which he proceeds to put his arms around her ultimately ending up in an awkward stance looking quite strange to spectators and sometimes ending up (much to the males happiness) a HOT PASSIONATE..kiss haha. Well guess what.. i was involved in said cliche minus the HOT PASSIONATE kiss. Though it was doubly awkward especially cause i didnt even know the guy. Thanks Matt for forcing me to play the final hole of golf. I WAS VIOLATED.

I cant wait to see ZOMBIELAND!!!!!!!!!!! Really keen on watching it Anyone up for it with me?

That Is All.

EVERYONE

2009-10-30T05:51:00.001-07:00

is for reals blogging now. starting tomorrow night i can and will start blogging again.

Love to yo-yos

2009-09-12T02:04:00.000-07:00

Although i dont really have the energy to blog im gonna do it.

Today was UMAQ/UMAC? open day. went with the ever so lovely wong.
Trackworks sucks (N) just sayin' what everyones thinking.
But train rides are always fun with wong.
I pretty much love your mum btw wong :D

so we ran into ray at strathfield and kept running into him after that.
FREE V AND FREE REUSABLE PONCHOS!! etc.
We walked into the business building and i faked an interest in an accounting degree JUST to get a yo-yo. totally worth it though.
I LOVE INCONSPICUOUS FREEBIES.
SAW KIKI!
got lost.
SAW THE CAMEELLSSS. they were like almost 100 years old.
and they were resting AND EVEN THE CAMEL MAN SAID THAT THEY SPIT and what guys and what.
Then we got lost.
Then decided to go shopping. BOUGHT A BRAND SPANKIN NEW WALLET.
went a little crazy at city beach with hats.

Then continued to train ride home all while playing with yo-yos and taking maddd photos.
cause im a badass photaagghraapphhaaaa..
and wongs just a badass yo-yo-ah.

END RESLUT OF TODAY:
* new wallet.
*new love for yoyos.
*could possibly dig umac.
* slight dehydration as i didnt drink enough water.
*slight sunburn.
*best pens evuuhh.
*LOVEERRLLYY day with wongald ;D

diediediedie

2009-08-19T00:35:00.000-07:00

so i feel like death warmed up

Art exam tomorrow.
i hope im not this sick in the morning (N)

on the bright side finally got around to re-downloading all of versaemerge's Eps

YM@6(L)

2009-08-11T05:10:00.000-07:00

okay so ive known about this for a few days now but i keep forgetting to blog it because well ive been busy so here it is

YOU ME AT SIX WILL BE AT SOUNDWAVE 2010!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Its pretty known that PARAMORE will be in the line-up along with the few confirmed bands such as gallows and dance gavin dance (N) but personally ive already seen paramore and they're great

but ohmygod YOU ME AT SIX (L)

8.14 - Arist vs Poet

2009-08-09T01:28:00.000-07:00

Ah trials start tomorrow, oddly enough im not nervous..yet
GOOD LUCK EVERYYOONE :) (L)

Yesterday I went with Tayla to get her lip ring changed, i have a girlcrush on the chick that works at Industrie8 she makes me want to get a surface piercing on my cheek bone and on my nape thats how hot she makes weird pericings look. I think ive decided on getting a surface on the inside of my wrist. IVE ASKED AND YES ITS PERFECTLY SAFE..Its just the healing process thats 50/50 because of all the movement.

Then we went to visit Lala while her brother Emanuel played football at the field near my house. Ventured there with my newly dyed hair which i must admit I'm slowly starting to like it makes me look older..i got stared at by 2 guys who normally wouldnt be into a lady like me. It made me feel quite hot ;) haha. So anyway, we were hanging out and chatting and then some of the lights on the pitch go out ten- twenty minutes into the game. So we wait and it still doesnt come on so they called the game off so tayla and i raided woolies then went back to her house and just hung out.

Im not really dreading the trials sooner they come the sooner they're over.
I cant wait for wednesday and Friday my wonderful days off
Wednesday: daniels house
Friday: Daniels house then THE BRIDDEEEEE (L)

YESSSSSSSS.

and this is exactly why i wish to marry John O'Callaghan

www.textsfromlastnight.com

2009-08-01T05:46:00.001-07:00

My current obsession.
FML.com
no thanks.

(858): I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.

(434): why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
(540): you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.

(972): I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
(1-972): I want to be a cop.

(201): When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics

They wont be using their wands they'll be using their rhymes.

2009-07-28T06:50:00.000-07:00

LOL.

Darling- Eyes Set To Kill.

2009-07-25T18:45:00.000-07:00

Ive come to realise i havent posted a legitimate excuse for a post in awhile.

Holidays are nearing an end but my brain still refuses to tick over into "get assessments done" mode. I want to cry in shame. I woke up friday morning and had my textbooks and notes out and ready to get ancient history over and done with. I sat around all day myspace whoring and movie watching.
I AM DISAPPOINTED IN MYSELF.

I swore that saturday would be another day. The day in which I WILL WORK. Instead i made the choice to go to parramatta with my gracious mother who was sick but still took me with the intention to take me on a "birthday shopping spree" but alas we both had no energy to look.

Instead i bought myself the most amazingly warm purple pullover hoodie $13, an oversized grey pullover top $13 (not sure if im willing to test the boundaries of outdoor and indoor capabilities of this yet). And mother dearest bought me an adorable black Crochet vest $17 and the best long black cardi i have ever purchased in my life i think this was WOOO.

I decided to run into JB-Hifi just to "check" what they had as i always do.
STORY TIME!
Everytime i go shopping with a certain Daniel Bunyan he looks for A Skylit Drives album Adelphia and he NEVER finds it.
END STORY.
So as im parousing Jb i come across. Oh what A SKYLIT DRIVES ALBUM.
So naturally being the good girlfriend i am i called him and told him i was buying it so he doesnt have to bitch about never being able to find it.
I think this is the first time I've ever bought an album and havent opened it and eagerly looked at the album art in the booklet and the "thank yous" it KILLED ME. But i finally gave into my urges and after permission to open it.
I did.

My father has given me permission to get a pet Rabbit.
I've decided to name him paco.
I think theres talk of getting two rabbits i guess that means my sister is gonna be able to name the other one

Theres Still the question of what to name the goldfish im getting.
Any ideas?

<3

2009-07-23T00:21:00.000-07:00

I would totally sell my left testicle on the black market

Just to look like Hanna Beth

Youve got my head spinning heart beating out of my chest (8)

2009-07-13T05:55:00.000-07:00

IMMENSE SIGH OF RELIEF

Man oh man i was shaking like a mother fucker for a second there.

I feel reassurance.

FTSK- I dont know about you but i came here to dance

Revenge Of The Fallen

2009-07-12T18:14:00.000-07:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ALEX MARSHALL
(and a friendly reminder 8DAYSTILLMINE)

My sister is currently watching transformers 2, thus meaning im missing out on the simpsons marathon on Fox 8. Well its not a marathon but its about 10 back to back eps of the simpsons and they are all new eps. Not happy Jan.

So I've reduced myself to listening to there for tomorrow again and looking at gig shots on flickr.

Ive come to realize that there are 2 bands that never get bad shots taken of them (that is by the photographers who use actual digital SLR cameras and not camera phones)
Underoath is one of them I think as usually its photos of spencer his hair enables the shot to be amazing (and the stage lighting is always a bonus)Another Band is Bring Me The Horizon again yes most photos are taken of oli but there is no denying how good they actually are.
There are ALOT of really good live shots out there. I think they are my favourite i can spend hours just looking at them all. Hardcore bands tend to have better photos i think because they all go so damn crazy and get so much more into it and theres more variety in the shot. Thats not saying other bands and artists dont but its just my opinion.
I found a photo of Hayley Williams on flickr it looks like such a hardcore shot i was suprised at who it was. I love this photo oh so much indeed :)
Ive been trying to find a whole bunch of new music to listen to my playlists are becoming boring and repetitive ive found a couple.
Theres a band called Sunset Shootout that have this slow jam rnb sound to them
im very into "here with you" by them.
In the mean time heres there for tomorrows video for A little Faster- Oh and a photo of Christoper the drummer cause he is just lovely :)
okay..maybe another one cause i couldnt decide.

"sorry but im kind of seeing someone right now"

2009-07-12T00:59:00.000-07:00

I went walking with tayla today and we discussed a certain person and their reptuation to sleep around. This persons excuse for why they did what they did was that they were screwed over by their ex and then they didnt technically cheat because they were only seeing this person.

But what is seeing someone?
Ive been googling the term "seeing someone" and most sites recognize it as the act of sex.
URBAN DICTIONARY
'Unofficially' going steady with someone. Dating without the boy/girlfriend 'label'.
Is sometimes used to describe a relationship where individuals are having casual sex and are not actually 'item'.
In reality i think no one actually has a definition of seeing someone, or more everyone has their own definition. Theres always the never ending question of what it means.
Its kinda stupid in my opinion.

What happened to the good ol' days when women were "courted" then a proposal was made and then they were married usually before they even reached the age of 18?
yeah thats when the days were good..haha.

Just A Little Faster.

2009-07-11T19:02:00.000-07:00

I downloaded the zune media player AHH HOW SEXYY IS IT!!!
so much better than itunes.
Ive had " Just a little faster" by there for tomorrow basically on repeat all morning. I watched the film clip for it. Maika is such a loveely name he also has a veryyy lovely face and a VERY LOVELY voice . Chris Kamrada the drummer is adoreable also. Why the hell am i going on about their looks? thats not the point haha.

I've been doing my usual over thinking over a simple SIMPLE sentence.
I never thought that one sentence could do so much to my brain.
It feels like its going to EXPLODDE.
I keep analysing the "events" and either you are confused
or youre just waiting for the right moment?
Or maybe youre just over it all?

on yet another note has anyone listened to Ignorance by Paramore? Its epic. I have a feeling "Brand New Eyes" is going to be better than "riot"

"Show me what youre after just a little faster"

"I LOVE WONG BEST"

2009-07-09T04:57:00.000-07:00

Career Search was today it was good but shit at the same time.
I thought i was closer to my chosen career but sadly I dont think i am.
Advance Diploma of Marketing entertainment and music is just a fancy way of saying "you can do this yourself or in tafe but we wanna milk you for all of your $$$$"
But oh i really wanna do it.

HOWEVER
It was lovely to see so many old and familiar faces.
(L)

I signed up for the electoral roll today. I know cheesus im only turning 17 in 12 days. so ill be 18 in one year and 12 days. Why sign up now? I dont know what came over me, but i did it.

Our school FINALLY gave us decent transportation. Transportation in the form of a double decker coach. You might be thinking "so fucking what" but in all of my schooling life i only ever recall having shit coaches and buses. This marked an important milestone in every year 12 cvhs students life. Ah so much talking about the bus. ITS A BUS!!!

Im really looking forward to this weekend MCA (L)!
What else is there to do in the city?

I cant watch Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince when it comes out.Im working all day Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday. So i hope to be watching it on saturday if Wongy agrees that is :)

Im Not A Thief, I'm A Treasure Hunter

2009-07-08T03:50:00.000-07:00

Just thought i would do what kim did. hahah nothing else to do really...

10 things you wish to say to 10 different people.

1. You worry me so fucking much. Honestly woman you will be the death of me.

2. I feel the need to be on good terms with you..all the time

3. I hate you beyond compare.

4. I cannot believe i just said everything ive ever wanted to say..to you of all people. the ex-enemy.

5. What happened. We used to be so much more than what is left.

6. You have no idea how different everything feels this time.

7. I think youre pathetic. I love you. But thats just how i see you.

8. People shouldnt underestimate you.

9. You need to stop being a sheep.

10. (to the same person as point 2) why do i want to mention you..again?

9 things about yourself.

1. I Judge.

2. I hide my feelings far too much.

3. I really can be a hater

4. I think im boring

5. I want to travel

6. Im far too lazy for my own good

7. I think the best feeling in the world is when you can feel the music.

8. Im a thinker.

9. Im a reader.

8 ways to win your heart.

1. Be realistic.( good one kim)

2. Be honest.

3. Be spontaneous.

4. FIGHT BACK.

5. Good music?

6. Style. Please.

7. Suprise me.

8. Passion.

7 things that crosses your mind alot.

1. The one i love to loathe.

2. My failings

3. Friends

4. Mr. Right now.

5. family.

6. Whatever i just read.

7. what i really wanted to say or what i shouldve said.

6 things you do before bed time.

1. Drink juice usually.

2. A visit to lou..i mean the loo.

3. Shower

4. Read

5. Just lay there

6. Im usually texting right before i sleep.

5 people who mean a lot to you ( in no order!)

1. Mother

2. Tayla

3. Friends as a whole

4. Clara

5. Sister (more than i let on)

4 things im wearing right now.

1. Black trackies

2. Odd Socks (cause i can)

3. IKTPQ/BMTH tee

4. Underwear..of the bonds style.

3. songs that I listen to often.

1. Im not a thief, Im a treasure Hunter- A Skylit Drive

2. At A Guess Im Second Best- All Forgotten

3. An Infallible Remedy- Artist Vs Poet

2 things you want to do before I die

1. Do what i want.

2. Be happy. who doesnt?

1 confession.

1. I have far too much to confess.

runaway- artist vs poet

2009-06-26T07:24:00.001-07:00

Let the green eyed monster lash out.

You Left Me - The Maine

2009-06-24T04:19:00.000-07:00

Someone please get me Mike Fuentes Or John O'Callaghan for my birthday? K'thx.

Mike Fuentes (L)
John O'Callaghan.

*I hate how you trampled on his feelings and expected him to be the same.

* I'm relieved youre happy for me Honestly IMMENSE sigh of relief. love you oh so much.

* I worry about you....alot. Are you really okay?

* I feel horrible for hating on you for so long, you didnt do anything wrong.

* I dont trust you. And that is exactly why i talk to you. I know he knows more than you let on. Have you ever stopped to consider that was my plan?

* I have no respect for you.

* I keep thinking you'll like her more than you like me.

* If you stopped complaining and feeling sorry for yourself. Maybe things would be better for you. Self Pity never got anyone anywhere.

* When you leave next year, whats going to happen? A year with no communication. We may never be the same again!

* My theory is, you control our choices because you failed at your own. Wake up Noone likes what you think is "beautiful". Stupid Bitch.

* Still waiting for your excuses.

* You know how to make me laugh at the most unexpected moments. I love that.

OHMYG i sound so pessimistic. I really tried to keep it loverly.

One Month ;)

2009-06-20T17:05:00.000-07:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SHAIN(19th), REBECCA(20th), MATT (21st)
Well todays the 21st of June. That means ONE MONTH till my birthday.
So ive decided to make a list of what i want, just in case anyone wants to buy me a lil somethin' ;)

many of you would recognise the BRUTAL braclet as worn by Hanna Beth there are about 3 i want from her site guess which ones ;) Shes done a collaboration with glamour kills (L) www.jacvanek.net

The new range of drop dead clothing is (L) anything drop dead would make me a happy man (Y)
www.iheartdropdead.com

Ahh yummy i MUST have a zune (L)

I really dont care if or what you get me
id just love it cause you guys got me something..
awww how sweet of you jessica i hear you say.
yes.it IS sweet of me :)

Kill The Arcade

2009-06-13T19:55:00.000-07:00

Okay so i know i should be working on my ancient assessment but the way i look at it if tayla didnt bail on our skins marathon id be watching cook and effy bang so it doesnt matter. IVE BEEN YOUUUTUUBBIIINNGGGG (L)(L)(L)

Kill the arcade- Happy Birthday Bermuda Triangle now they are known as wolf am i. it makes me sad i like wolf am i but i prefered them as Kill The Arcade

Open the skies- He spoke of success. These guys have better songs but this is how i found them :)

i remember listening to these guys agessss ago. i (L)(L)(L) themm (Y)

i might make a proper post later .

That Boy That Girl.

2009-06-13T01:15:00.000-07:00

Im totally digging HADOUKEN! I didnt get that into them when there was that massive hype around them about this time last year. They werent my sound but i LOVE them as of about a week ago. Im currently inlove with the remix they do of The Prayer by bloc party. its epic. I have this little for James the vocalist..i think its only because i love the way he says hadouken plus his accent is lovely.

Another thing i love is sink into me by Taking Back Sunday. The lyrics are adorable :)

I'd like to be a note, the kind
You could sing but don't because you're shy
That way I live inside your throat
And hang from every word you...spoke

The old second/Backup (?) vocalist fred (thanks wongy) left TBS, i love the vocals of the new guy JOHN. i mean Fred was really good but the new dude is heaps good (Y). I miss watching Adams mic swings, which is why instead of posting up the actual music vid for sink into me i stuck up them playing it on Jimmy Kimmel..who is Jimmy Kimmel anyway?

Today has been such a crap day. I hate parents.

However.

What i do want to know is how long youve been hiding your eagerness to bang my ex boyfriend?
baby, I thought we were friends? Clearly not.

Oh sweetcheeks. If and when you get him I hope that everytime he kisses you or says something that makes you smile that you just remember that i was there first and that he's said it all to me before he even thought about those lovely two faces of yours.

So baby. Have my seconds.

My Tempreature Rising- The Audition

2009-06-10T03:11:00.000-07:00

UP-AND-COMING RELEASES/ NEW RELEASES:

There are oh so many more: MY AMERICAN HEART, Taking back sunday, a skylit drive. and oh so many mores. IM SO EXCITED. Bankrupt? yes.

I Hustle Everyday

2009-06-07T23:29:00.001-07:00

Im officially bankrupt.
I neeeed more money.
I need a better job.
oh well. ill get it.

Im really addicted to deez nuts at the moment, ive always listened to them but at the moment i cannot get enough of them. They are playing at the manning on the 4th of july for their Drunk and Disorderly Tour. I WANT TO GO.

speaking of wanting things and the month of july
MY BIRTHDAY IS JUST AROUND THE CORNER!
Sweet 17? Mother dearest said i could have a party for my 17th at the new house because i didnt end up doing anything for my 16th. Love it?!
There are many things i want for my birthday alot of them are international purchases.

This long weekend was terribly boring, wouldve had a better time at school today.
okay thats a lie i enjoyed sleeping in, but im still realllyyy tired.
Sick?

I hustle every day

2009-06-07T23:29:00.000-07:00

Traitors Never Play Hangman

2009-05-19T04:04:00.000-07:00

HATER: It most commonly refers to individuals whose negativity is so extreme that it is all-consuming. However, there are various levels and forms of being a hater, ranging from completely dismissing any positive traits or actions, to merely painting a less than flattering picture by using words with negative connotations. Hating is often attributed to jealousy, but just as often, it seems to stem from some other source.

I dont think im a hater..well not a hater just negative, its just easier to dislike things and people after all.

If you:

dont let yourself get too close
dont like someone
dont like something

It Cant:

disappoint you.

hurt you.

let you down.

lead you on.

It works out easier.
Its easy to find things wrong with the world.
Negativity is in abundance.
Its hard to find beauty and postitive aspects to everything.

Sleep with one eye open.

2009-05-17T02:15:00.000-07:00

So yesterday was the bride, bermuda and hospital the musical @utopia.

then bring me the horizon, the red shore and cancer bats@ the roundhouse .

At utopia the Lead singer of hospital the musical was CRAZY he thrashed around EVERYWHERE. it was an unforgettable set maybe that was their point?

The Bring Me The Horizon gig was better than i thought it would be, i think what killed it for me was a number of things:

*we waited in line for over an hour when we shouldve been let in. it was too cold.
*all of the filthy smokers smoking in the line. esp when we were under the shelter etc. twas so hard to breathe.
* before horizon came on alot of the crowd was screaming "Oli, Oli"
what the fuck?
*some random behind me kept screaming "oli you sexy boy i wanna have sex with you right now"

Epic fail.

But overall it was quite good, i enjoyed the cancer bats even though their frontman is filthy his hair makes me want to dry wretch.

TRACKWORK (N).

"Shit always happens nothing is ever good, its just the level of shit thats different"

Is It Progression If A Cannibal Uses A Fork?

2009-04-22T07:01:00.000-07:00

School holidays are such a drag i cant go anywhere because i have work

but working means money

and what can i spend my money on?

Nothing.

I Find myself earning money, yet it seems to disappear.

On saturday i went to the bleached ep launch:

**got there WAY too early

**OHMYGODLOOKITSJAYSON!

**Awkward Turtle
**GROUPIES, now really ive seen some whoppers in my time but these girls took the cake.
"do they only sell emo stuff here?"
*squeals OMMMFFGG LOOK JAYSON IS STANDING LIKE RIGHHTTT OVER THERE
worst moshing ever and as for their head banging? a few of the lovely ladies got a little confused as to what genre they were listening to and as to what role they were playing they started to do that sexy hardcore headbang/spin/swing those sexy metal heads with long hair do.

**Girlfriends.

**Hormonal teenage girls.

**Dodgy tat artists.
**Amazing Photos

Overall it was an epic way to spend my saturday.

THIS SATURDAY, i hope to be buying some new shoes and a new jacket.

THEN. I'm going to a gig at the blacktown masonic centre or something rad like that

$15.9bands im damn excited.

im really digging Hiroshima Will Burn at the moment. Yes an insensitive name but hey they are damn good.

The age of the understatement.

2009-04-12T01:58:00.001-07:00

Gilmore Girls marathon (Y)

brings up all kind of love.

Peer pressure umm, pressuring me to blog has made me actually blog

now i just cant figure out what to say.

Im full of angries and i love it :)
After over a month of being fine, im not anymore.
Why are you fine?
Why are you such a jackass now?

What did i do wrong to deserve your actions?
You're the one who did the wrong thing yet you make out im the bad guy.

Why am i the bad guy?
I should hate you.
You deserve to be hated, what your doing to me is what i should be doing to you.

You deserve nothing. yet you seem to have everything.
The day it comes crashing down is the day you finally get whats coming to you.
I should be over it and i am in a way.
Im over you as a person.
Im over what we used to be most of the time.
but im not over what your doing and what youve done.

What the fuck happened to you?

You treat people like shit you expect them to bow down to you. and for what? because you think you're better than them? Well wake up.

your the bad person. Your the one who should bow down to them for taking your shit.

And one day you will.
Until then

Keep living and treating people how you are.
because i cant wait to see it crash around you.

Your "perfect world" is going fucking down.

I Love you and Goodbye

2009-03-27T00:39:00.000-07:00

hey, so you may of heard, and the rumors are true. Curtis Ward is no longer a member of bring me the horizon. This decision has been a long time coming, and although everything can look fine from the outside, theres been a problem for a long time. Over the last year especially, our touring schedule has been crazy, we are hardly ever at home, and for curtis, this proved very hard. we could see that curtis wasn't enjoying this band like the other 4 of us were anymore. It was nothing personal it was a decision that wasn't made lightly, but one that we believe is best for the band's future and for curtis's life. we wish curtis all the best in whatever he chooses to do in the future.but no one fear! the band will not be splitting up, this is something that we did to prevent the band from splitting up. we will still be doing all our future tours, currently finishing up taste of chaos with our good friend and guitar tech dean, who also looks abit like donkey kong.

Not mother fucking happy jan.

I've been bitching about this somewhat all week, i cannot get over it

he was deffo my fave. !!! OF ALL PEOPLE TO GET HOMESICK.

harden the fuck up princess.

okay. okay im kidding YES i am upset but its just how it is i guesses.
*sigh.

60th POST!

2009-03-17T02:01:00.000-07:00

ahh just a quick one

SO MANY EXCELLENTAY GIGS THIS YEAR!

so far im going to

*Bring Me The Horizon-May 16
* The Getaway Plan- May 30th

* ALL TIME LOW- June 5th

Unsure of any more up-and-comings

Brokencyde and paramore are supposed to be here at the end of the year

so im fair pumped.

WHY CANT THE MAINE COME HERE

HOW COULD YOU DENY JOHN WITH A VOICE LIKE HIS!!

In Regards To Myself.

2009-03-10T15:00:00.000-07:00

Cassie:You know what hurts the most about having a broken heart? Not being able to remember how you felt before that. Try and keep that feeling because once it goes, You'll never get it back.

Jal: What happens then?

Cassie: Then you lay waste to the world and everything in it.

Im not usually a wallower. I dont like to feel sorry for myself.

Why should this be any different?

On the other hand not at school today.
Moving, Studies (assessments/half yearlies) and personal issues are causing somewhat minor breakdowns within my brain.

On yet another hand,

I GOT THE INTERVIEW FOR SELLING SHOW BAGS AT THE EASTER SHOWW!

It makes you tell the truth and stuff.

2009-03-07T19:44:00.000-08:00

Such a longgg weekend. All i want to do is sleeps

FRIDAY:

Jackkyyy drove me to wongys house for her birthday party, THANK YOUUUUUUUUU !

Mucked around for ages it was pretty damn random, WONG YOU SICK PERVE TAKING PHOTOS OF MY BUM THEN DEVELOPING THEM!

I drank about three bottles of red bull (alcohol wasnt allowed) and just mucked around with jason, shain, chris and ginny, went driving to get pizza, made friends with the pizza chick.

Ate pizza with too much bbq sauce and then talked about lesbians.

Played spin the bottle, then chicken (not that eventful) CHRIS THE PANSY PATTYCAKE wouldnt kiss anyone LOL.

LEFT MY WALLET THERE, so i couldnt spend any money all weekend, which i must admit was a good idea cos, i need that money. but still

*tear.

SATURDAY:

Went to bankstownnnn with mum bought clothes for my sister to wear to lisa's engagement and tried to find clothes for myself and looked at stuff for the new house (SO EXCITED). Met a totallaayyee awesome chick that works at boost "OMG YOUR GOING TO HORIZON? ME TOO!!!". Got home, got ready for the mystical engagement party,caught the train to parra (we were running late HURRAY), walked to the place where we were at (the rsl i think?). Partied with my already intoxicated older cousins, mucked around and took random retarded luvos with my cousin leshay whilst piggy-backing her (in heels). Was a total random idiot, eyed up the really handsome half cousin of Lisa's Fiancee. I think his name was kevin. Went home, i think overall we waited for like an hour just to catch two trains to get home. I officially have blisters the size of twenty cent pieces on my feet and my whole body hurts from piggybacking kids allnight.

Also, as i was intoxicated, im sorry to anyone i texted, you know who you are. It was jsut one of those moments. Sorry.

SUNDAY:

Woke up hoping that my parents didnt hate each other after the mass fight they had when we got home. All was well. Fixed up my legal assessment and downloaded skins.

JJ's episode, every episode i watch, it becomes my fave. But i think this will probably stay a top 3 it was so deep and emotional. but seriously who hasnt had sex with each other yet. everyones pretty much had sex with another person in their group. COOK HAS A HEART

Cook: She loves you. But she can’t stand it. Can’t stand the love, so she fucks me instead.

I’m pissed off, yeah? She’s taking the piss and it’s hurting me. Cos Cook needs the love too. Cookie’s got nothing. Cookie’s always got nothing. That’s why I do her pal. That’s why I pop Panda. Panda’s popped. It’s always the same. Great tits Panda, great tits, Effy. That’s all I get cos I’m shit. I’m pure shit.

Ergh i need sleeepppss.

want me back.

2009-03-03T00:01:00.000-08:00

Naomi: Sorry. It just.. isn't a goer.

Cook: Fair enough.

Naomi: Is that it? You're not even gonna try to convince me? Most guys would..

Cook: Most guys aren't me, babe. You fancy me, I'm cool with it. So there's obviously another reason why you won't fuck me, and it's probably a good one because you're, you know, clever..

Naomi: You're a lot nicer than most people think, Cook.

Cook: Fuck you.

Naomi: Fuck you right back

Emily: Twice. You're going to do this to me twice. Naomi, no. You fucking - stop right now! Don't you dare leave me in your bed again!
Naomi: I've got to go.
Emily: I know you, Naomi. I know you're lonely. I think you need someone to want you. Well, I do want you. So be brave.. and want me back

The two things that i totally love in the new ep of skins atm.

Isnt naomi just so pretty?

I know its crazy, but its so hard to pretend.

2009-03-01T23:25:00.000-08:00

FAMOUS.
GUNS FOR GLORY MUSIC VIDEO YESTERDAY.
Was the most bad-ass fun ive had in such a long time, i went with tuan taylah and anelese.
To cut a long story short, walked around newtown for awhile then went to FIND newtown nth public, got lost, got pointed in the wrong direction fifty times, got there, waited, waited, waited, got makeup, waited outside while everyone else ate, "danced" while listening to music and making new friends and bitching ;), went into the hall to get started, waited, went off at disgusting PDA couple (practically sex ;D), Had a cardboard sword fight, did random dance moves, signing forever the sickest kids, got directions from the director (Director: dont look directly at the camera it intimidates audience AND DONT SMILE AND WAVE THIS ISNT MTV GUYS) , STARTED, moshed, moshed, moshed, break, cracked more jokes talked to the band, NOTE Vin gets his hair SUPER shiny by not showering and when he does he only uses baby shampoo. And there were stupid butt licking groupies there >_> i mean like wtf they were only talking to anthony "like omg and why that guitar WHY ARE YOU DRINKING SO MUCH RED BULL oh wow you changed your t-shirt the other one looked so much better " like just suck his fucking penis already girls.

ANYWAYS. Moshed, moshed moshed. Stupid uni girls were so pansy just stood there and swayed. We made a bunch of friends and cracked much jokes GIRLS GONE WILD. We tireed to bang into the uni girls but when we did they just kinda jumped back = =". FINISHED, as we were leaving we took a photo with the band ANELESE TOOK IT AND OUR FACES ARE ALL BLURRY and she DIDNT take another. (i'll stick photo up when i receive it

As we were leaving we saw a crowd around the guitarist anthony it was all the butt licking groupies, HE HAD T-SHIRTS and he gave them all ot the girls that would give him some...i.e NOT US. pfft. w.e "but we're like in the GFG army and we asked you to bring theeemmmm" >_> pfft moles.

On our way home got the most yummyyyyyy icecream 2 scoop in a cup raffelo + chocolate for me watermelon +lemon for Taylah and Anelese and then the most chocolatey chocolate for tuan.

Got home at like 8? Went to sleep at 9:30

I was all tuckered out :D

*sighs. Shopping.

2009-02-28T01:32:00.000-08:00

I (L) PENRITH JB-HIFI

Okay so today i went to penrith, just a change in scenery, it was good, i went with tayla

and as a result i managed to purchase

LEE JEANS

AGRACEFUL'S ALBUM , THE GREAT I AM

a bunchsicles of DVDs

and other things

Im walking through penrith and this random lady comes up to me "excuse me i LOVE your hair, where did you dye it?"
"i did it myself"

"oh wowits amazing whats the brand etc etc'
Later washing my hands after peeing (yes im graphic like that)

"oh i love your hair its so vibrant :D"

pretty coooooll (Y)

So Agraceful is a random myspace band, that i sadly could not download

and i VERY much love them, like many bands i seem to be listening to these days are christian i (L) them verryyy much so.

I ran into my cousin lisa whose engagement party im attending next weekend and sweet jesus i highly dislike her soon-to-be sister-in-law i dont really know her, shes 13 i think and she just came off really egh and >_> but ill give her a chance i guess, I WANNA WEAR REALLY HOT HEELS but i cant find any i REALLY like so ill probs just wear my red formal shoes. :)

im so exhausted.

JIZZ IN MY PANTS

2009-02-27T14:33:00.000-08:00

- TAYLAA . LOVEbilalskiezz&&selwyn! jordan <3 says:
you know what would be shit timing. when your doing shit with a guy.. and then hes like uhhh. i think you just got your period hahaha omg how shit would that be.
ViVA LA JESSiCA says:
HAAH =oo LAME!!
ViVA LA JESSiCA says:
HAHAHHAHAHh
ViVA LA JESSiCA says:
that would fucking sucks
- TAYLAA . LOVEbilalskiezz&&selwyn! jordan <3 says:
its funny but at the same time if it happened to you youd be like D: NOOOOO!!! hahaha
ViVA LA JESSiCA says:
HAH yeahhH!!
- TAYLAA . LOVEbilalskiezz&&selwyn! jordan <3 says:
hahahaha blood everywhere ew. the guy would freak ouy lmao.
ViVA LA JESSiCA says:
HAH AI KNOW RIGHTT
"i thought you said youve done this before"

Im sorry. I cant. Dont hate me

2009-02-26T16:26:00.000-08:00

Im not at school today cos i have the cold. How great is that?

Id love to thank claraa and wei and annie, for a) making me laugh for about two hours

and b) givng me a wonderful yet disgusting orange substance to calm me down.

School yesterday was so/so i wasnt at school for long and everyone worked pretty damn hard at cheering me up and insulting you. I know you read this now, i know for a fact you read this, and im glad you did in a way because maybe i would never have had my chance to get all of that off my chest esp when you can never handle hearing things that dont go your way in a positive light.

gosh im getting over this pretty fast. Im starting not to care already.

I watched sex in the city last night the one where carrie gets dumped by Burger (a person).

I guess atlesat i can say i didnt get dumped over a post-it note

things could be worse.

2009-02-25T02:17:00.000-08:00

YOU INSENSITIVE FUCKING CUNT

City in a snowglobe

2009-02-23T00:16:00.000-08:00

I really have mixed emotions about hate blogging and ive been trying for a few days not to hate blog, thinking maybe this would end real quick maybe YOU wouldnt drag this out.

Fuck that.

WARNING: Mass amounts of foul mouthed language may appear in the following hate blog.

Block your eyes.

What the fuck did i do wrong? So wrong infact that you cant even talk to me? You cant even bring yourself to tell me you arent talking to me. One of your little "friends" had to come up to me and still put it nicely "your not being ignored, but you are..but you arent...BUT YOU ARE. A cooling down period is required if you have anyproblems we will gladly see to it that it is delivered but there is no guarantee that it will be seen im not on anyones side im a fence sitter i want to see the best outcome because if it does turnout good i wont be hated by either one of you".

Well right now i want to tell you to get fucked you immature wank but why, whats that gonna fix? I read some of the lovely things you said you disliked about me to my BEST FRIEND you dumb fuck did you think i wouldnt see? You hate that im angry all the time? well have you ever stopped to think why im so angry all the time and why i get upset? That maybe your fucking "say before you think" comments arent what ACTUALLY upset me that there is an underlying cause? and that your sick of never winning well maybe if you fucking MANNED UP AND DIDNT BITCH IT you would win and im sorry i thought as a person of your status you were supposed to accept me for who i am. Your "well meant" Pm's on msn are infuriating. fuck your "will it be enough?" fucking bullshit we all know your just trying to buy time to fucking break the bad news to me in a "nice way" that "doesnt make you seem like the bad guy". "oh i was hoping you would be in a better mood tonight i wanted to talk" Is that the only thikn you care about? me being in a good mood so you can have a nice conversation? I tried to calm down i tried not to be so upset for YOUR SAKE. And then i talk LIKE YOU WANTED TO i didnt want to talk about anything because i knew that my mood was still on shaky grounds but i did it for you. And what happens you decide you WANT TO WIN? win at what you fucking cunt? me never EVER showing how i really feel infront of you ever again? And your contradictions YOU COULDNT HANDLE THE FACT THAT YOU THOUGHT I WAS IGNORING YOU for an hour when i WASNT. how the fuck do you think i feel when youve been ignoring me for three days. But its okay for you to "ignore me but not ignore me" but its not okay if i do the same? How about how i feel, all the fucking time, its okay for you to say " i dont like you being angry all the time" but you know for a fact that i WAS NOT angry all the time its the current change in circumstances. Its okay for you to do and say whatever you want its justified in that fucked up mentality of yours.

I dont even know what to say anymore im just so over you and your smart ass "aww i was joking you arent really that fat just big boned" fucking comments. IT FUCKING HURTS YOU DICKHEAD ESPECIALLY WHEN YOU SAY IT ENOUGH FUCKING TIMES. That may fly well with your other friends but it doesnt go down well with me.

Well whatever. Keep "cooling down" or whatever it is you claim your doing.

The longer you leave me out of the loop and bitch to my bestfriend the worse its gonna get and be when you finally harden the fuck up and grow big enough balls to finally talk to me. Because as of rightnow im not gonna sit up for all hours of the night thinking "okay maybe just maybe ill get a phonecall or a text message"

Fuck it.

Dont trust me.

2009-02-22T22:44:00.000-08:00

This song is OLDER than my grandmother yet it is only hitting airwaves

now?

"hey there delilah" all over again?

i think so.

Ignore.

2009-02-21T22:44:00.000-08:00

to refrain from noticing or recognizing

Fuck you.

Dont get me wrong i love everybody talking to me on your behalf. But dont spare me your fucking "i dont want to hurt your feeligns" bullshit, tell me straight.

REBBOUUUNNDDD! REEBBOUNNDD!

2009-02-20T02:04:00.000-08:00

Okay so today i went to Minto to be an official for zone basketball. It was HOT.

In both ways, damn FINE ref, Julian his name was very good lookin (Y).

Okay so after The Lansdowne Zone got kicked out (bossley, canley, st johns etc.) we barracked f0r Mc Arthur. Those boys were VERY nice to us ladies esp. Number 8 Alex, he taught kim how to use the scoreboard machine thingy and they all spoke to us and made us feel loved and they thanked us at the end of each game we scored for them like WHERE WOULD THOSE SCHOOLS BE WITHOUT US!? Ms. Valiss was there today, she was a ref. She was taking food off us and talking to us ALL day and we didnt even realise it was her till she said "see you on monday girls" Me: Whats on monday? More basketball?. Valiss: SCHOOL LADIES!

Yeah. Right.

Kims dream man was on the train home, she was pretty much ready to jump him, well so was i he was pretty damn hot, he winked at me *proud* LOL NOT YOU KIM SO MAN UP!!!

No big deal id go Julian anyday over him. He looked like a cocky emo prick. And some of the ballers got off at liverpool and they walked past us and nodded and smiled and waved etc. and kim was like OMG LOOK ITS THE HOT ONE! and she went to hi-five cindy but cindy was too busy smiling at the hot one and i was smiling at one of the guys from our lansdowne team and she got ignored..it was funny cos i think they noticed.

SHOES OF MY DREAMSSS (for the moment)

Okay for you kids who watch skins, EFFYS BOOTS

I FOUND THEM AND I MUST BUY! $70 yummie.

valentines.

2009-02-18T00:44:00.000-08:00

Cutest thing ever.

9094

2009-02-16T01:12:00.000-08:00

Thers something about the carriage,9094.

ART EXPRESS i thikn the only work i really really liked was by a fairvale student.
Not only was it magnificent but it gave us hope. 95% of schools in artexpress are private or higly funded, most of us went there today and were disappointed in our works which can only be described as scribbles the hsc markers will barely look at. And then there is this work which is amazingly detailed drawings drawn on paper,with incredible captions which are so deep. And its framed with textured cardboard, it was so lovely. I think what outraged me most about this years artexpress came down to one artwork i cant complain really about the art works they were really good and their concepts were twice as good too. ONE ARTWORK WAS A CANVAS...mainly black with subtle dark browns and reds through it, now we've been told that you also get marked on how well your concept/theme is potrayed through your BOW. Now i looked at this and thought. WTF this kid had basically four terms and this is what he came up with. His concept was basically "the end of the world" i think the concept was good but the execution was just pathetic it was one of those things where his portfolio is probably better than the work itself. Now i know its slack to totally talk this down but in my opinion if you are going to get into artexpress it shouldnt be based purely on concept because alot of people dont read the little white rectangle and say "oh so thats what that is". But overall good work (Y).

THANKS FOR OFFERING ME THE PEANUT BUTTER CUP BITCHY!

SO AFTER we ate and went to art express, shain thily and i went walking around the city. We went into dangerfield and shain was standing at the door, ans he was like "hey jess look your future emo boyfriend is coming", i looked outside and trace is walking towards us and i think hmm he looks like trace cyrus then i see a short anno girl walking behind him OMG SHAIN ITS HANNA BETH and trace cyrus!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

FROZEN YOGURT PWNS. Thanks for showing me where it is thily (Y)

So freaking pissed off.

I WENT WANDERING AROUND THE CITY WITH THE INTENTION TO SHOP SHOP SHOP.

and what....NOTHING!

Fuct up.

2009-02-13T05:09:00.000-08:00

Okay so these lovely ladies are called the millionaires. its hard to describe my relationship with them their music is somewhat listenable but god i love the lyrics :)

Love, love, love. What is it good for? Absolutely nothing.

2009-02-07T23:18:00.000-08:00

I havent blogged in awhile (neither has chrissy. if you are reading this update asap my lovely).

HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY JASON MY SEXYY PORNSTAR!

Ahaha yes a week too late but i think i should never forget to say it. Esp. to him :)

Had an epic time at his pornstar (slut) themed party. JAGERBOMBS! love them. if it were a person id marry it. Apparently they are really bad for you stimulant+depressant= death setence. But hey mix my two liquid loves together..i choose to ignore the problem. I think thily getting drunk will forever be a highligh in my life. I choose to never forget that. "I HAVE A MOLE ON MY BOOOBBB :(" lololol.

SKINS (L) the only thing i can rely on to make me happy. Episode three! "hallo i am thom-as, so glad to meet you. " AHHH HIM AND PANDORA (L) (L) (L) (L) (L)

Geh

one question. mainly for myself.

Is it the end?

"i mean damn whats not to adore"

2009-01-20T06:04:00.000-08:00

NEVERSHOUTNEVER...amazing i love it :) to the core. he is amazingly beautiful this song is so lovely.

Im in trouble

Im an addict Im addicted to this girl

Shes got my heart tied in a knot

And my stomach in a whirl

But even worse I cant stop calling her

Shes all I want and more

I mean damn Whats not to adore

there is an official clip for "bigcitydreams" on his myspace. cant see it on youtube though :(

Prada Or Frada?

2009-01-18T05:09:00.000-08:00

I just read that everyone is a fake and are never who they really are.

In someways i can see the logic in a statement such as this. But i do disagree in most aspects, at one point or another a person will adopt unreal qualities and mannerisms, their reasoning for such an action?

First off can you define fake for me? Dictionary.com has many definitions for it how can i choose one that fits.. anything made to appear otherwise than it actually is; is the more fitting one for such a statement as above.

I think each situation is different to the next as is a person and their views, every action has a motive every experience has created personality traits that make you who you are. So to say that a person is a fake is an unfair accusation in all respects. I can honestly say that there are people who often change themselves in order to fit into a niche that they want. That can be viewed as fake can it not? But it is also change, this person is changing themselves. Who is to say that what they are now is who they really are as a person? They may be comfortable as who they are now. What or WHO are we to judge them .We say that people who alter themselves to fit in are fakes, but what of the people who have an addiction and then change themselves to benefit those around them, does the transformation they undertake thus make them fake also? Perhaps when they were high or drunk or on a trip etc. they felt as real as they could ever feel and now that they are sober they feel that they are not living how they really wanted to yet they live on transformed into something that makes us as a community feel safe. This to has the ability to be seen as fake, yet do we see it as fake if it benefits us?

I would be a right idiot if i believed that we were all who we really are supposed to be everyday of our lives. Though i think it is entirely wrong to ever call a person fake.

I'm sure anybody can be SEEN as a fake, but it all comes down to JUDGEMENT,

"let he who is without sin cast the first stone"** i think this is the ultimate quote said by Jesus Christ himself when a woman caught committing adultry was sentenced to be stoned to death. Although it is not entirely used in the same context now it fits. As the statement says everybody is a fake yet if we call another a fake, what are we to label ourselves? If the statement is to have a ring of acceptance from me i say this. Do we have the right to judge someone when we ourselves are no different to who they are (or who they are pretending to be) ?

Im really tired right now..i maybe contradicting myself. Do tell me if i am.

**He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone at her

"somethings gotta happen to start us off"

2009-01-18T04:07:00.000-08:00

Skins season three is out in the UK in a few days and im super excited i will be streaming ASAP. It looks set to be insanley wild and insane and i cannot wait. The cast looks really good there is nothing really negative about anyof them anyway here they are!!:

Thomas: He wasnt in the sneak peak so im not certain about his role yet.
PANDORA! was in the second season with effy, boy has she changed ill try and locate a season two photo of her she was amazingly retarded.

Naomi: Somewhat of a jal i think but god i love her attitude already "sorry im NOT a babe"

Katie: The wilder of the twins (emily) Never not had a boyfriend since she was 7

Karen: Freddy's sister i think she is amazingly pretty. Not much on her yet.

JJ: He seems to be a major mystery. But a pretty mystery he is.

Freddy: Is such a fit young lad :) he seems very sincere and patient. Broken heart waiting to happen.

Emily! the innocent twin never had a boyfriend and seems to me that she is not a friend of naomi's

Cook: Seems to be Tony and chris rolled into one i see the cocky-ness that tony has in him but also the wild party side that chris has. All in all. Very good (Y)

EFFY is damn hot and she is Tony's sister she is the rebel and someone i think im going to love to hate.

NOW FOR THE SNEAK PEAK

"Its got potential this day..It's pregnant"-Cook.

BETTER YET FIRST PART OF THE SEASON

I Will Admit,

2009-01-10T05:46:00.000-08:00

that my entry the other day was and still is harsh and irrational. Im not entirely sure if i meant all of what i said, not only about my frustrations towards a certain person or about my frustrations towards myself. I have noticed a sudden influx of mood swings and outburts of anger and i honestly dont hate everybody.

As you guys will see, ive tweaked my page to look a little less white and a little more red and black? Typical emo colours ahaha but it was totally purple first time round. Im having a hard time deciding on images for my header, with that i have decided to re-take up photography. Im looking for new things to experience this year, and i feel THIS IS A KEEPER! Im learning to skate thanks to my darling tuna fish and i hope to learn guitar (that wont happen as jordan crudely pointed out). 2009 can and will be wild that i assure you.

Today was a fair good day, went to Glebe with Clara and Wong. Before we even arrived at the markets we had already purchased mass amounts of books 'Impulse' by Ellen Hopkins. As you can see i put a quote from her book on my side panel thingy i really like what it says, despite the fact that it seems really "hey dont be a pansy try harder to kill yourself next time" it somewhat has a deeper meaning, "dont do the minimal to get what you really want..go that extra mile, shoot that extra guy etc." I also Got a book called 'Adverb' im not sure who its by because it is not next to me at the moment. I got some rad purchases, LEE denim (highwaisted it seems) shorts $10, Purple zebra-ish print sunnies $10 (looks better than it sounds), Pin-stripped Vest $15, 'Soap' Purple Printed tee (record player) $10 and homemade lemonade+some really cool pastry unsure of what its called it had walnuts in it yummy $8. I ran into some really cool people today i really wish i took photos of some of them, despite really cute stall owners there were some scene chicks i loved their style i can genuinley say they had some of their own style not some version of what scene kids are supposed to look like. Skaters OMGSH they had some balls skating down stairs time after time KNOWING they were going to stack it, yes they were cute but the skating had me before the looks.

TASTE OF CHAOS 2009 MAY NOT BE COMING TO AUSTRALIA! I'm not 100% yet but at the moment it seems like they arent and i am PISSED OFF. BRING ME THE HORIZON AND PIERCE THE VEIL are apart of the line up the line up is currently: Thursday, BMTH, Pierce the veil, Cancer Brats and Four year strong. Personally i like the lineup, all of those bands are fair awesome. BUT BMTH AND PTV ARE THE REASON I MUST GO!

Okay im extremely tired right now, 1:22 AM. Sleep is ESSENTIAL.

Oh Oli.

2009-01-10T03:00:00.001-08:00

okay so like not a proper post yet or anything i was just on flickr and i came across this random photo its totally adorable! yes i am jealous on the photo comments the authour (her dad) was saying that he was gonna give her a kiss on the cheek but she wasnt having any of it and that he and his eldest daughter like BMTH but she hates em!! ITS NOT FAIR I (L) HORIZON AND HE OFFERS TO KISS HER ON THE CHEEK AND SHE DOESNT EVEN LIKE THEM :@:@:@.

will blog aboutmy day later.

Im not bitter this shows i care

2009-01-07T03:09:00.000-08:00

Honestly right now there is one thing on my mind thats really pissing me off.
I hate people, well most people. The people i do love and care for...you know who you are i love you.

But you, honestly we have never even met but everything ive heard you deserve to be called what i called you. It was a joke, do you know what one of those are? Clearly not. I was simply joking around after hearing what you did to one of the few people i care for, maybe there was some truth and honest opinion in the nickname but honestly get over it.

Hate me i dont give a fuck enough people hate me and im down with that at least i know who my friends are. To get your boyfriend to voice your opinion of me is bloody immature, if it wasnt for him telling me to drop it i would be confronting you and trying to make it somewhat okay. But why should i bother? Youre making a massive deal out of nothing making a mountain out of a molehill as they say. Maybe im doing the same by blogging my thoughts making it a bigger problem. But i need to get it off my chest.

I like totally love you right?

yeah yeah im back, blah blah blah

long time no blog jessica where have you been?

ON WHAT YOU PEOPLE CALL A HIATUS?

Ive taken yet another personality change maybe we should call it a new found perspective. certain events causing said hiatus has changed me as a person. Ive found im a very angry person now, antisocial and quite often hard to amuse, i found that many people who i once really really liked or was really close to really really piss me off i see major flaws major things that i was once blinded by. I think heaps of people are sick of my shit i think heaps of people really dislike me but good on ya! (H) chances are i hate you too. Once a glass is half full kinda lass, im now a the glass can be whatever the fuck it wants to be. doesnt change the fact that im gonna drink it and it soon will be empty.

I need a new years reso dont i? Gosh what should it be? Should i be a cliche?

"LOOSE WEIGHT"
"FIND LOVE"

"GET A BETTER JOB"

Okay firstly i dont see myself as fat. Secondly ive found love. Thirdly..yeah i hate my job but im not obsessed with getting a better job.

My new years resolution:
"go with the flow, calm the fuck down, grow bigger balls, confront those who piss you off, fuck everyone else, be who you want to be"
Its 2009 baby. you guys better watch out.

Im making it wild.

These Secrets will kill us.

2008-10-29T00:38:00.000-07:00

I havent blogged in so long.

Well today sure was cold and rainy.
Im on a reading rampage i cannot stop reading.
I ordered The catcher in the rye off ebay the other day i should get it soon :)
I read polly, i bought it for $ 10 at a bookstore in glebe and its quite good.
Not amazingly wow, but i enjoyed it. I liked the mention of music and her hardcore-ness

haha. but its not that great either. Its a book based on a series of relationships and growing up and losing her virginity etc. etc. I insist that mike was the best boyfriend she had next to todd (despite his crazy antics)

WHEN WILL THE HSC ENNDDD .
I really want to do School radio.
Then there is School cert. and geessusss.

I think the year 10 roll over next week. That means we need to share the senior toilets with them. Great. Lung Cancer anyone? I think we will all become passive smokers and the doors will be tagged with shit etc..

Hallowweeenn party coming up on friday. Hugh Heffner is me. I cant decide if i should slut it up or just go as an old man. I think im getting sick off my parents (thanks guys) so i hope im still well enough to go on friday.

Ive been doign so good with school. Doing my hwk everryy day. im so proud of me :)

anyone have any ideas for my major im feeling so clueless on what to do.

Pissed? I think so.

2008-10-15T02:37:00.000-07:00

Hi Jessica,

Thank you for your kind email. With regards to volunteering as you can appreciate we have been producing events for quite some time and we have a full staff , should our situation change , we will keep you in mind.

Kind Regards

Carissa

this is in regards to myself emailing the people oragnising the twilight convention for possible volunteer work. to make matters worse. im not allowed to go to the convention purely based on the fact that it exploits teenage fans and is robbing them of their "well earned money" according to my mother. great.

6 months babyyyyy <3

2008-10-14T02:26:00.000-07:00

HAPPY 6 MONTHS ADAMMM <3

Ray: 6 Months just flew didnt it?

Thinking about it, it did. A good 6 months :) I've quite enjoyed this year as a whole. It started pretty horrible but it got better :D

Not much really to blog about , school is killing me

....

......

With boredom, everyone is going crazy with "year 12 is killing me already" blah blah blah. Im dead bored, though i loved the finishing at 12:03 today it was quite the awesome. Im completely freaking out about My Art Major, i need to have a deffo theme/concept by week four and im totally blanking. Any ideas?

Also any ideas on what costume to wear for halloween?

We Take This To The Night - The Mission In Motion

2008-10-11T18:05:00.000-07:00

I love these guys atm. I saw them at escape the fate.They are so addictive AND AUSTRALIAN. I saw their album in jb a few weeks ago but i cant find it anymore. when i do find it i WILL buy it because i cant dl them :( its really sad.

What if im the bad guy?

2008-10-10T03:47:00.001-07:00

OHHHH MYYY GOOSSSHHH.

OFFICIAL TWILIGHT TRAILER.

SO AWESOME.

SO SO SO SO SO SO SO AWESSOOMMEEEE.

At approx. 20 seconds into the video YOU SEE JASPER (L)

Im getting so excited i cannot wait till Dec. 11.!!

Beach was yesterday, i was (still am sick) We went to bondi. I woke up not really feeeling like going but i asked Wong to come therefore i had an obligation to go :) I had a great time. Sadly no tan (N). Chrissy, Wong and myself hung out alot in the waves poor chrissy was getting killed by them, wong and i kept laughing at almost everything and i kept repeating "MY EYES THEY BURN" "MY EYEBALLS ARE IN HELL"..."SERIOUSLY ITS NOT EVEN FUNNY" and wong laughed and laughed. I lost my sunnies then found them, wnet to pick them up and i got knocked over by a wave. At 12 wong and i ventured through bondi attempting to watch the twilight trailer, thanks to me telling adam to check before we went, we found out it actually came out at 2 like christoper told us orignally, but wong thought 12 pm.By this stage my vocal cords were starting to diminish rapidly. Went back to the beach and then went back out to eat food :) Chris bought me a mc flurry, THANKS :). I spent most of my time in the water, yes it was cold and yes the salt and coldness of the water was killing my throat, i still had a ball. Wong lost her sunnies which was unlucky. Went home watched twilight trailer WOO!.

Today went to parramatta, Boarders didnt have The Hunger Games so i bought High Jynx, not sure what its about but it looks heaps good. Also bought an atticus tee, white with 4 Red sunglasses on them. FINALLY BOUGHT HORIZONS NEW ALBUM (okay its only been in australia for like a week but thats 7 days too many) listening to it now, its heaps awesome. I read the thanks and Curtis Ward, as adorable as he is he really isnt that bright. I almost lost my max brenner virginity today, though i realized i had no money left. So Sadly i could not.

TWLIIGGHHHTTTTT (L)

2 For My Seconds.

2008-10-08T04:47:00.000-07:00

okay so im currently blogging for the sake of blogging.

Yesterday i went to adams and watched Pirates 3 and Loser.

Both very diff movies, yet both amazing.

At the end of Pirates i asked the stupidest question, "you know how Jack Sparrow wears heeeaaps of eyeliner, what did real pirates use and how did they get it?"

Adam: .......

Wtf Jess LMAO.

Oh. And i also want a massive pirate boat like the black pearl im going to call it Emo Express (first thing that came to my head i assure you its lame now as i type this) and im gonna pillage (maybe not) and drink rum (or red bull) and sing pirate songs (or emo ones) and kill fish (but not people) and fly black flags with razors on them (cause thats my logo be afraid) and im gonna say "WHAT ARRRRRHHH YAH DOIN' " (like CPT. Barbosa) and yeah. Also Loser is an amazingly cute movie i love it. I cannot get enough of this movie the kiss at the end when their in the veterinarian Clinic and yeh he has a hair cut and he looks cool and adorable and yeah. HAPPY ENDING.

Today i went to work :) i got there at 12 according to my phone and it felt like i was there forever. That is until i realized that the clock at work hadnt been put forward when i was on the phone to wong, Smart. Right?. I got sent home 30 mins early because i was coughing like a serial smoker..still am, i think i could be sick. Before work i watched Hanging with operator please at splendour in the grass on channel v. They are really funny kids, and i was right the original pianist (sarah) had left and its TOMS (the drummer) cousin (forget his name he is new chris i think) stepping in her place. Taylor the violinist made a very good point it went something like "Alot of people call us stupid and other young musicians stupid but we arent. what we do takes skill and alot of dedication and sacrifice they are right in the sense that alot of us dont have an education i gave up year 10 Amandah couldve gone to uni etc.. but what we do isnt easy. We gave up school friends a normal life you cant just come back and pretend its how it used to be etc.etc." It doesnt sound good how i typed it cause i dont remember how she said it. I like how she pointed out the sacrifice and how its hard, and i like how she set people straight on being musicians being stupid you need to know alot about what you do blah blah blah. I have also learnt that Amandah swears more than i do and we all know i swear like a sailor. I have also learnt that making a set list is really hard to do :) oh the wonders of television.

Bet you guys never wouldve guessed that i was an OP fan, guess again they are so cool. Oh did anyone notice that all the songs that they made videos for, were original songs or demos or w.e. The original version of get what you want is so much better than the video version.

The End.

SUICIDE SEASON!

2008-10-04T04:49:00.000-07:00

HORIZON STREAMED THEIR NEW ALBUM ON THEIR MYSPACE, SO UNTIL I GET PAID I CAN LISTEN TO IT VIA THEIR MYSPACE. I really love the lyrics to alot of their songs, its 100% different to their old stuff and i thought it would be a bit ehhhhh at first but its amazingly awesome.

If ANYONE comes across this issue of Kerrang YOU WILL BUY IT FOR ME KAYY

Suicide Season:We stare at broken clocks, the hands don't turn anymore.The days turn into nights, empty hearts and empty places.When you lost him, I slowly lost you too.For when he died, he took a part of you.No time for farewells, no chances for good byes.No explanations, no fucking reasons why.I watched it eat you up, pieces falling on the floor.We stare at broken clocks, the hands don't turn anymore.If only sorrow could build a staircase, or tears could show the way.I would climb my way to heaven, and bring him back home.Don't give up hope my friend, this is not the end.Death is only a chapter, so lets rip out the pages of yesterday.Death is only a horizon. And I'm ready for sun to set."IF ONLY SORROW COULD BUILD A STAIRCASE, OR TEARS COULD SHOW THE WAY, WE WOULD CLIM OUR WAY TO HEAVEN, AND BRING HIM HOME AGAIN."We would do anything to get him back to you.We would do anything to end what your going through.If only sorrow could build a staircase, or tears could show the way.I would climb my way to heaven, and bring him back home.I would do any thing to bring hime back to you.Because if you got hime back, I would get back the friend that I once knew.

No Need For Introductions, I've Read About Girls Like You On The Backs Of Toilet Doors (okay so this is just a title but i love it)

DECODE!

2008-10-04T01:51:00.000-07:00

so much to blog about. must summarise.

THURSDAY 2nd: UNDEROATH CONCERT.
Was totally awesome deffo the best concert ive ever been to, met a whole bunch of new people. Some rad emos that live around my area. Kit and i were at cabra station and they were like...HEY! ARE YOU GUYS GOING TO UNDEROATH?
Us: Yeah?
Them: WANNA COME WITH?!

And then these really cool guys from Newcastle, told us to cut in line with them cause we were on the same bus and ate at maccas with emm. Speaking of which some little maccas worker found THREE underoath tix.

A silent fiction played again as support played the cover of Rollin' again.

Bought a rad tee. Got to the front, lost my right shoe (not my left like etf) went back then decided nahh man getting to the front again so i did. :) Spencer spat on me three times. not sure how one should take that. they played my fave song "the created void". And i got kicked in the head by a crowd surfing loser. I have come to notice the aromas you smell at a concert apart from the typical sweat/B.O. , i generally smell, Cigarette smoke, Lynx Vice (suprisingly), Hair Product (usually fructis or sunsilk). Also i have noticed that smaller or younger guys tend to look out for you as opposed to older tankier guys, i have a theory that its because the older ones think that they have superiority over us or somehting, not sure but over 18s are usually a**holes. I was not pitted (Pushed under someones arm pit) this time though i was pressed against bare back. I WAS SO CLOSE TO GETTING A DRUM STICK :@ it hurts more then being faraway and not getting it. Ended up catching the bankstown line home, which we found out TERMINATED AT LIDCOMBE so $35 later and a lovley long taxi ride to cabra station and an beautiful just after midnight stroll i arrived home at 1:30, which is when the bus at Lidcombe was due to arrive to take us to cabramatta.

FRIDAY 3rd Awoke feeling hungover. That kick in the head sure as hell made it feel like i partied like paris hilton. My neck wasnt as sore but my legs hurt. Towards the end of the day my legs and head were fine but the pain in my ribs kicked into place. But i sucked it up and took the pain and went to SWITCH, Neiter hindsight or Silence Wakes The Dead won, but they were still amazingly radical. Michael, Chris, Jason, Shain and myself left to go mucking around after the second band started because they were shit. Met up with kim and then went back to watch adams band then HindSIGHT. Mucked around, winners were announced, Michael gave us a ride home..Btw SORRY TO HEAR YOU LOST YOUR WALLET MICHAEL.

Today: Went to the hospital with clara to see Jennifer she is getting better after her head banging injury. Spent alot of the day at the starlight playroom? CAPTAIN STARLIGHT seemed to me to be like a bit of a slut when she isnt working on planet starlight and it also seemed like she was re-creating the big bang quite frequently with one of the musicians that came TO PLAY SOME SONGS FOR US. Almost stayed at the hospital with clara for the night but came home instead. LISTENED to Decode by Paramore, its quite good :) Cannot wait for Twilight to come out :)

Cookie Jar - GYM CLASS HEROES

2008-10-01T03:39:00.001-07:00

This is a small announcement to my lovely boyyzz of
hindSIGHT

YOU GUYS ARE THE BEST (Y)

You guys made me all happy today at that pal college thing, and y'all dedicated a song to ME!

NAWWWW.
LOVE YOUUUZZZ.

checkk emm oouutttt BONNY FRIDAY NIGHT SWITCH YO!

Miley Cyrus VS Selena Gomez!!!!

Yes very laggy of me isnt it, wasnt this fight like..ages ago?

Well i only watched the videos of them today. And as many of you know i really dislike Miley.

So Selena is my personal prefrence, besides what Miley did was C-U-T. I think Miley is just sore that Selena has her ex now NICK JONAASSS...and is wayy prettier.

I mean id be pissed too. Miley maybe more famous now. But HELLO almost all disney actors CRASH AND BURN (e.g Britney Spears she was a umm mickey mouse clubber?) eventually cause they all get big headed. Plus if it wasnt for her dad..where would miley be?

Okay i feel bad for just burning Cyrus, but i dont like her.

So good luck to her.

May the best mickey mouse ass kisser win =)

who's side are you on.?

I shall leave you with a photo of nick jonas..i mean how couldnt you love that face?

Hope You Drop Dead Gorgeous.

2008-09-30T01:14:00.000-07:00

(8) I just dont care hope you drop dead anyway

-Short Stack, Drop Dead Gorgeous.

Is it just me or are my final "free holidays" the worst I've ever had?

Harden The Heck Up Jessica. Get over it create your own fun right?

NO I CANNOT. I just cant seem to get excited, and when i do get a little amped, people ditch, dates change.

etc..etc..

SELFISH- devoted to or caring only for oneself; concerned primarily with one's own interests, benefits, welfare, etc., regardless of others.

I feel selfish and annoyed and disappointed and upset and almost every negative, pessimistic emotion

possible. Underoath is on Thursday....days are lagging and people have..yes DOGGED IT. two to be exact, which leaves TWO people left going kit and i. All i can say is that it better be a damn good concert.

Lift me from my crap mood and ill make all your wildest dreams come true.

Lost/In/The/Sound/Of/Seperation

2008-09-29T02:41:00.000-07:00

A powerful enemy has been made, im not sure who im supposed to hate.

Queensland police or escape the fate / Parkway drive.

On my ticket for the UnderOATH concert it says that my beloved show is TOMORROW.

IT ISNT.

"A few weeks ago, the guitarist from the band, Escape The Fate, exposed his genitals to some very underage boys while on stage at The Arena in Brisbane. As most of you know, this came on the back of the "public disturbance" at the Parkway Drive show at the same venue a few months ago." According to underoaths blog. they need to change venues because "QLD Police no longer trust this venue to perform the requisite due diligence before holding all ages shows." The venue "the tivoli" or something has replaced the sydney show with tomorrows slot and now we have to wait till thursday...we are the final aus show. WE WERE GONNA BE THE FIRST SHOW. WTTFFF. i was suupperrr excited and now NOW...i have to wait.

let down? I THINK SO! I can understand why they did it, but im still sad =( LOL.

On a positive note!! Their new album is totalllyyy cool! and A silent fiction is supoorrrtt saw them at etf they were rad..

Coldplay- We Never Change.

2008-09-26T05:02:00.000-07:00

I wanna live life and never be cruel

I wanna live life and be good to you

And I wanna fly and never come down

And live my life and have friends around

We never change, do we? no, no

We never learn, do we?

So I wanna live in a wooden house

I wanna live life and always be true

I wanna live life and be good to you

And I wanna fly and never come down

And live my life and have friends around

We never change, do we? No, no

We never learn, do we?

So I wanna live in a wooden house

where making more friends would be easy

Oh, and I don´t have a soul to save

Yes, and I sin every single day

We never change, do we?

We never learn, do we?

So I wanna live in a wooden house

Where making more friends would be easy

I wanna live where the sun comes out ...

NEVERSHOUTNEVER!

2008-09-25T02:39:00.000-07:00

I'm a little bit insecure

From all of this mistreatment

But see I'm workin it out

Workin it out you're so damn hard

When you're alone

And I was one who thought I was strong
Well you proved me wrong

Now I'm singing along to every song

On the radio I don't wanna go

Come on baby tell me

Something I wanna know

And I don't wanna see what's on my mind

Because this lack of motivation is

Taking over my time and I'm sick of trying

-Yourbiggestfan

Should be blogging about how GREAT camp was. But im really in a horrible mood.

I've been mood swinging like crazy for the past three days. Im not one to get PMS (got my period the day after camp.LUCKY? i think so.) maybe its not pms, maybe its lack of sleep. in four days ive had a total of 23-25 hours sleep which isnt much for me(or anyone else?). Camp wasnt that great for me there were high points and low points. I was NOT a happy camper.

I dont even know what to blog about. Should i try and explain my mood? Should i bore the few people who read this (does anyone read this) with crap that probably doesnt make sense. The bottom line is i dont know who i am anymore. i dont know who i have. i dont know what to do. i dont know where to go. Camp showed me that. Should i be grateful that thats what i learnt at camp? Camp is supposed to bring people together and i wasnt brought closer to anyone.

A Drifter. A person, with no real place to call their home. They wander from place to place, sometimes looking for something. Sometimes becuase its the only way to get away from everything that made them become drifters in the first place. - Urban Dictionary.